Red Letter Revolution

It seems that in these days, there is no more hotly contested idea than marriage. Marriage has leapt to the forefront of conservative ideology, and has divided the nation as severely as abortion or any of the other controversial issues. In light of this, it seemed increasingly important to look at what the Bible has to say about marriage. Specifically, Paul makes many statements that help form what marriage is from the Christian perspective. However, before I begin about what marriage is, we should discuss what marriage is not. Since marriage is the only valid place for sexual intimacy, Paul’s condemnation of homosexual sex prevents any biblically minded Christian from endorsing marriage among homosexuals. Rom 1:26 For this reason God gave them over to degrading passions; for their women exchanged the natural function for that which is unnatural, Rom 1:27 and in the same way also the men abandoned the natural function of the woman and burned in their desire toward one another, men with men committing indecent acts and receiving in their own persons the due penalty of their error. The word translated as function in this passage literally means employment of the body for sexual purposes. There can be no doubt that Paul is speaking against the perverse sexual ways of the people at this time. The issue is of supreme importance today, because of the slippery slope involved. In his online weblog, Albert Mohler, president of Southern Baptist Theological Seminary, noted how the debate over same-sex marriage has opened the door for legalization of polygamy and other deplorable sexual practices. Another set of verses worth mentioning occur in first Corinthians. 1Co 7:7 Yet I wish that all men were even as I myself am. However, each man has his own gift from God, one in this manner, and another in that. 1Co 7:8 But I say to the unmarried and to widows that it is good for them if they remain even as I. Some people confuse Paul’s language and think that Paul is saying that married people are somehow less faithful to God, the biggest example of that being the Roman Catholic Church forbidding its priests from marriage. However, Paul speaks against such misinterpretations in his letter to Timothy. 1Ti 4:1 But the Spirit explicitly says that in later times some will fall away from the faith, paying attention to deceitful spirits and doctrines of demons, 1Ti 4:2 by means of the hypocrisy of liars seared in their own conscience as with a branding iron, 1Ti 4:3 men who forbid marriage and advocate abstaining from foods which God has created to be gratefully shared in by those who believe and know the truth. Now that we have covered what marriage is not, let’s look at the meaning of marriage. Webster’s original dictionary defined marriage as: The act of uniting a man and woman for life; wedlock; the legal union of a man and woman for life. Marriage is a contract both civil and religious, by which the parties engage to live together in mutual affection and fidelity, till death shall separate them. Marriage was instituted by God himself for the purpose of preventing the promiscuous intercourse of the sexes, for promoting domestic felicity, and for securing the maintenance and education of children. Christian marriage is a union between two Christians for the purposes of a godly relationship. “In contrast to marriage to an unbeliever, what kind of yoke is that of two believers? It is of one hope, one desire, one discipline, and one and the same service. Both are brethren; both are fellow servants. There is no difference of spirit or of the flesh. Rather, they are truly two in one flesh. Where the flesh is one, the spirit is one too. Together they pray; together they prostrate themselves. They perform their fasts together, mutually teaching, mutually exhorting, mutually sustaining. They are both equally in the Church of God; equally in straits, in persecutions, in refreshments. Neither has to hide from the other; neither shuns the other; neither is troublesome to the other. With complete freedom, the sick are visited and the poor relieved…. There is no stealthy signing, no trembling greeting, no mute benediction. Psalms and hymns echo between the two. And they mutually challenge each other as to which one will better chant to their Lord. Christ rejoices when He sees and hears such things!” Tertullion paints for us a wonderful picture of the potential of a Christian marriage. Tertullion hit the nail on the head concerning what marriage was meant to be for believers, a blessing and an encouragement. Love between two human beings rooted in the example of God is a powerful thing. John Crysostom remarks, “Young husbands should say to their wives: I have taken you in my arms, and I love you, and I prefer you to my life itself. For the present life is nothing, and my most ardent dream is to spend it with you in such a way that we may be assured of not being separated in the life reserved for us. I place your love above all things, and nothing would be more bitter or painful to me than to be of a different mind than you.”Paul tells of the importance of both men and women to the Lord. Marriage is not the subjugation of women. 1Co 11:11 However, in the Lord, neither is woman independent of man, nor is man independent of woman. 1Co 11:12 For as the woman originates from the man, so also the man has his birth through the woman; and all things originate from God. Loving interdependence for the purpose of the advancement of the Kingdom of God is the essence of a Godly marriage. As John Wesley explains, “And as the woman was at first taken out of the man, so also the man is now, in the ordinary course of nature, by the woman; but all things are of God – The man, the woman, and their dependence on each other.” The culmination of Paul’s teaching on marriage, in my opinion at least, is in Ephesians. Eph 5:25 Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself up for her, Eph 5:26 so that He might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, Eph 5:27 that He might present to Himself the church in all her glory, having no spot or wrinkle or any such thing; but that she would be holy and blameless. Eph 5:28 So husbands ought also to love their own wives as their own bodies. He who loves his own wife loves himself; Eph 5:29 for no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ also does the church, Eph 5:30 because we are members of His body. Eph 5:31 FOR THIS REASON A MAN SHALL LEAVE HIS FATHER AND MOTHER AND SHALL BE JOINED TO HIS WIFE, AND THE TWO SHALL BECOME ONE FLESH. To me, these words are a powerful reminder of God’s plan for man regarding marriage. God intended for our marriages to be a fulfillment of our own individual lives. So, I leave you with the humorous words of Socrates, “My advice to you is get married: if you find a good wife you will be happy; if not, you’ll become a philosopher.”

For those of you who are theologically minded folks, the subject of Calvinism is probably a familiar one. I have spent considerable time with this unique group and I am still far less than an expert. However, it seems I find them wherever I go. A random encounter at a bookstore from a girl who “Needed Help with Calvinists” led me to yet another cluster of Calvinists. Since I had spent a lot of time arguing with them till I was blue in the face on an Internet chatroom, my friends deemed me the best able to help this girl, and so they introduced me. She gave me the website of a Calvinist dominated message board centered around Caedmon’s Call and Derek Webb. Despite being predominately Calvinists, there are, as in most communities, those oddballs. It was when I was dealing with a non-reformed liberal christian that I learned my greatest lesson about Calvinism. This young man decided that the destruction of the Canaanites as ordered by God in the Old Testament was inconsistent with a loving merciful God. I, not wanting to remove the Old Testament as scripture, immediately took the opposite position. I was irritated by his bold assumptions and exagerated language. I went on the offensive, and pulled verse after verse from the New Testament. Before long I was spouting Potter analogies left and right. In retrospect, I realized that this must be exactly what the Calvinists are feeling. I’m not claiming to be a Calvinist, but I think I understand them a little better. How arrogant I felt he was, saying God can’t do this and God can’t do that. I bubbled with anger at his disregard for what was obviously the truth in my mind. That is something to think about. In the way that I saw him, so do Calvinists see me. I pray they are not right.